Do you ever feel like you are wading through mud? Not just literally -- even though if you live in my area there is plenty of that to wade in. I am talking figuratively.
It seems lately that I have been wading in mud. I can't seem to be able to pick my feet up and move like I want. I am weary from just the basics of life. I just can't seem to avoid dirt.
All three of my sweet family unit are sick. Poor JP is still struggling with his cold. I think we might have to go back to the doctor on Monday. He is like a snail leaving a slime trail everywhere. I am wiping his little nose all the time. It makes him so mad. Nate is sick. He has been hibernating for the last two days so he could make it to work today. I am sick. My head is heavy and so is my heart.
What amazes me is that as I read the blogs of several of my friends, there seems to be a lot of weariness and discouragement going around. I wish I handled mine with as much grace and ease as it seems others do. I keep hoping one day I will finish my growing up and be able to wear my big girl pants.
Well, I am going to keep walking -- all the time singing Isaiah 40 to myself until it permeates my heart.
Friday, February 5, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Worldy Solutions to Spiritual Problems
I was watching Dr. Phil today (I know a guilty pleasure), and his show was all about people who were bullied in junior high school. They appeared on his show still hurting twenty years later. Life had moved on, but these women still carried their hurt.
I myself extremely dislike junior high. I really disliked being in sixth grade, and I was not too crazy about teaching seventh grade years later. As a preteen, I was bullied on the way to school, in class, and all the way home. It is hard being 5'9 and 115 pounds in the sixth grade. Reading that sentence, those sound like model measurements but add in a bad perm, braces, glasses and lack of coordination and -- well, you get the picture. As a teacher, I felt helpless because I knew that many times when I intervened in bullying I was only able to address the behavior and not the motivation of the heart behind it. Junior High is such a hard time, and I believe a lot of that has to do with the age of accountability (a complex subject better addressed by a more competent person than myself).
Anyway, Dr. Phil is talking to these poor, hurt people. One lady went into modeling and another went into exotic dancing looking for ways to improve their self-image. Both of the bullies involved in these cases did not even realize they had hurt anyone until years later when confronted with the facts. Here is the point -- bullying is a spiritual problem because it involves lies that come from the enemy and attack the heart. Dr. Phil as nice as he is, was offering reason to deal with a heart issue. Hurt does not need reason. Hurt needs healing and heart healing only has one source.
Let's continue my story. By the end of high school, I had learned to fly low and unnoticed, but I still smarted from some of the comments I had heard. I had lost the braces, glasses and perm. I was still tall, but fortunately some others had caught up with me (by this time 5'11). I was still very insecure and fearful.
So here is the million dollar question: Why was I not on Dr. Phil?
The answer: Jesus
When I was 16, I went from learning about Jesus to living for Jesus. I gave my life to Him and when I did, He took all the sin, hurt, and pain. I have not forgotten the comments and even how I felt during those times of bullying, but these hurts have lost their sting. Truth about who I am in Christ removed the sting, and even during those times when the enemy tries to throw them back at me, they do not stick because I am covered and sealed by the Holy Spirit until the day when Jesus Comes.
It is funny that even as I write this I am once again struggling with my self-image. New circumstances and new people but same fear. Wonderfully, same source for healing. Thank you Lord Jesus for being the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.
I myself extremely dislike junior high. I really disliked being in sixth grade, and I was not too crazy about teaching seventh grade years later. As a preteen, I was bullied on the way to school, in class, and all the way home. It is hard being 5'9 and 115 pounds in the sixth grade. Reading that sentence, those sound like model measurements but add in a bad perm, braces, glasses and lack of coordination and -- well, you get the picture. As a teacher, I felt helpless because I knew that many times when I intervened in bullying I was only able to address the behavior and not the motivation of the heart behind it. Junior High is such a hard time, and I believe a lot of that has to do with the age of accountability (a complex subject better addressed by a more competent person than myself).
Anyway, Dr. Phil is talking to these poor, hurt people. One lady went into modeling and another went into exotic dancing looking for ways to improve their self-image. Both of the bullies involved in these cases did not even realize they had hurt anyone until years later when confronted with the facts. Here is the point -- bullying is a spiritual problem because it involves lies that come from the enemy and attack the heart. Dr. Phil as nice as he is, was offering reason to deal with a heart issue. Hurt does not need reason. Hurt needs healing and heart healing only has one source.
Let's continue my story. By the end of high school, I had learned to fly low and unnoticed, but I still smarted from some of the comments I had heard. I had lost the braces, glasses and perm. I was still tall, but fortunately some others had caught up with me (by this time 5'11). I was still very insecure and fearful.
So here is the million dollar question: Why was I not on Dr. Phil?
The answer: Jesus
When I was 16, I went from learning about Jesus to living for Jesus. I gave my life to Him and when I did, He took all the sin, hurt, and pain. I have not forgotten the comments and even how I felt during those times of bullying, but these hurts have lost their sting. Truth about who I am in Christ removed the sting, and even during those times when the enemy tries to throw them back at me, they do not stick because I am covered and sealed by the Holy Spirit until the day when Jesus Comes.
It is funny that even as I write this I am once again struggling with my self-image. New circumstances and new people but same fear. Wonderfully, same source for healing. Thank you Lord Jesus for being the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.
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